Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Fallow

I really haven't loved much of anything that I've sewn lately.

This happens to me cyclically- I just seem to run entirely out of inspiration and fresh ideas. Everything feels tired and contrived.

I think I've learned to deal with it a little better over the years. I used to panic that I was ruining a perfectly good thing by not being able to keep up either the workload or the creativity. Now, I feel that sensation as an annoying sense of inadequacy, but its lost the sharp ruthless feel of the past. I still revisit my fantasy of having a life coach who who give me perfect directions on how to navigate it all, but so far, none has landed up in my laundry basket.

Years ago, I once prayed at my keyboard. I sort of asked God to be "in charge" of it all, or something equally predictable and churchy. But I always refer back to that moment. Back to the idea that this can't/ought not to/must not be about me. My successes. My inadequacies.

So, I'm sitting fallow right now, as I have been for some months. It's not because I don't have time- I'm managing to waste all sorts of time on pinterest, so that's an implausible excuse. I just have to rest my create-a-sizer. It just wants to, and I've learned that forced creativity produces some pretty butt ugly work.

But I'll pop up again, and I hope to "see" you there.

4 comments:

Brenda said...

I find that creativity goes underground periodically, only to surface when you least expect it. Deadlines can also be great motivator. I think it's OK to take a break here and there. I have a small box of goodies for you sometime. maybe those will spark something.

PrairiePeasant said...

Sometimes it helps to challenge yourself with something new. Maybe a piece of fabric that you've been waiting to use, or some embellishments or a colour you don't usually work with. If try to focus on the small instead of the huge it might get you going.

Linda said...

No worries, your creativity will come back and when it does, we're here waiting! Enjoy your time off!

bygeorge! said...

Hi there,
just missing you,and reading your blogs. I suggest a blend of blog issues,(bag4 and peena), tweaked by that yarn type overpriced clutch. (remember?)
How about a few flaps
in the face of body image.
some Rubenesque type yarn drawings on the flaps of bags...
just drinking and thinking...
B.Babe